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Confused About Giants-Based Christianity? Ask an 11th Grader

5/24/2015

2 Comments

 
Is there such a thing as a brand of Christianity that revolves around the existence of giants?  Yes . . . well . . . maybe kind of.  The notion that evil giants are central to understanding the world, the human condition, and the future is out there for sure.  While giants-based Christianity has some vocal proponents that are apparently making a living by selling it, however, I'm not sure how widespread the idea actually is.  How many people believe this stuff?  I have no idea. And I'm not sure how one would find out.
PictureI looked at a lot of elephant car photos (mostly from Burning Man) and decided that this one best represents the thrown-together ridiculousness of giants-based Christianity (source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/susanafs98/2313166391/)
If you're not sure how someone could build a "Christian" religion around giants, you're not alone.  It is a monstrosity constructed from all kinds of parts that don't initially seem to fit together.  What do the stones at Baalbek and Stonehenge have to do with Jesus? How is Noah connected to Hitler?  How are the pyramids of Egypt, genetic engineering, Sodom and Gomorrah, and the serpent gods of Mesoamerica related to one another?  Giant enthusiasts weld all these elements together, but it is difficult to find a clear, concise treatise that explains how. I have arrived at my understanding of giants-based Christianity -- still far from complete, I'm sure -- in the same haphazard way that the blind men examined the elephant and that Johnny Cash built his '49-'59 automobile: one piece at a time.

If you want a path of less resistance to understanding this stuff, I recommend a paper titled "The Truth About Giants" written by Adam Schwartzbauer, an 11th grader (in 2010).  I found it on the website of the Twin Cities Creation Science Association (TCCSA), a Minnesota organization whose mission is to "present evidence for creation and a young earth."  Schwartzbauer's paper is a 24-page document (there is also a 10-page version) that lays out many elements of the modern, giants-based Christianity, including:

  • The assertion that giants and fallen angels were involved in genetic manipulation of plants, animals, and humans (pp. 3-5);
  • The assertion that giants and fallen angels brought about the Flood by corrupting the Earth (p. 4);
  • The assertion that giants were created by the devil to corrupt the human bloodline so that Jesus could not be born (p. 7);
  • The assertion that the Israelites committed genocide in Canaan to wipe out giants (pp. 9, 12);
  • Fascination with the nuts and bolts and angel-human reproduction (pp. 10-11), including:
            - angels having forcible sex with human women;
            - giant babies being cut out of women during childbirth;

            - speculation about what an angel's DNA would be like;
  • Specifying that giants had six fingers, six toes, and double rows of teeth (p. 11);
  • Confused arguments against evolution (p. 6);
  • A nod to Hitler (p. 12);
  • Blaming archaeologists for hiding evidence (p. 12);
  • The assertion that structures built with large rocks must have been built by giants (pp. 12-15);
  • The assertion that evil giants were homosexual (p. 19);
  • Supporting the existence of giants based on:
        - texts, including Genesis and a variety of extra-biblical religious sources (e.g., pp. 2-3);
        - tales of pre-1900s "giant skeletons" from the Old World and the New World (pp. 11, 16-19);
        - world mythology (p. 2);
        - accounts of purported giant human footprints in ancient rocks (pp. 19-20);

The alert reader will notice that many elements of this new strain of Christianity contradict mainstream Christian teachings.  I'm no theologian, but here are few that jump out at me:

The doctrine of Original Sin (the idea that humanity has inherited the consequences of Adam's rebellion again God in the Garden of Eden), for example, is at least undermined, if not completely contradicted, by the idea that it was fallen angels and their evil offspring that caused wickedness in the world and brought about the Flood.
Problems with being human?  Blame the giants!  A giants-based Christianity places responsibility for the troubles of humans squarely on the shoulders of giants.

The idea that angels could mate with humans and produce fertile offspring is also opposed to most mainstream Christian thinking.  The Living Church of God website, for example, states that
"To claim that angels had the ability to create flesh (the giants) from spirit is not only illogical—it is blasphemy."  Angel DNA?  What does angel DNA look like? And doesn't the idea that the mating of two different "kinds" (angels and humans) can produce something novel (giants) contradict a basic argument of Young Earth Creationists that different species can only be divinely created?

The mixture of biblical and extra-biblical sources used for creating this giants-based framework of belief is also different, I think, from what most Christians would accept.  You won't hear quotes from the Book of Jasher in Sunday School, but the Church of Giants accepts as legitimate anything that seems to support the relevance of large, evil beings to the history of the world.  The Nephilim whirlpool provides equal weight to
biblical, New Age, occult, political, cultural, and historical currents.  It's an idea in search of positive evidence, not the other way around.

Sure, the writing in
Schwartzbauer's paper is a bit choppy, but the document is useful because it summarizes many of the basic elements of a giants-based Christianity that the "experts" dole out for money. As a free publication that is just 24 pages, your investment of time and money is much lower than if you actually read the books by Steve Quayle and L. A. Marzulli (which I have not read and cannot bring myself to purchase). The TCCSA website also includes an endorsement of the book by Joe Taylor, creator of the 47" femur sculpture.
  So there you go.  It's not high prose, but it will save you some time groping the different parts of the elephant and understanding the emerging framework of giants-based Christianity.


Related (5/25/2015):  Jason Colavito examines the claim in the paper that Nimrod built Baalbek.
2 Comments
Graham
5/24/2015 01:30:05 am

From what I have heard the best source on 'Angel DNA' is Melba Ketchum(sic) the woman behind the infamous Bigfoot DNA study, supposedly Bigfeet (Giants...?) were the result of the mating of Humans and an 'Unknown Humanoid Species'. Allegedly the early drafts of the paper specifically identified the 'species' as either Angels or Nephilim.

Reply
Bob Jase
5/24/2015 03:04:58 am

Still leaves the probhlem of theodicy - possibly makes it worse as it depicts Yahweh as even more incompetent.

Reply



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